My 11 year old asked me this the other night at bed time. She's been getting upset with herself for not doing the chores that we ask of her. She wants to do them, but is the type of kid that gets distracted. I struggled with this for a moment, thinking of all the bad habits we have as adults that take virtually no effort to form. Good habits on the other hand take consistency and focus, two things that are foreign to many 11 year olds (and adults, for that matter). I then suggested two jars, one empty, one full of mables (representing intentions to stay focused). Each time she did a task that could lead to a good behavior, she moved a marble. If a day went by without a good habit, she'd move it back. There are now 4 marbles in the previously empty jar. Good habits according to her:
- cleaned her room
- kept her room clean
- kept her room clean, again
- didn't get upset when coach yelled at her during practice (took it as constructive criticism)
Not sure if there had been more, i.e. they had a short life in the good habit jar before returning to inventory of intentions jar; but proud of her for taking ownership of this and anxious to see if it lasts beyond the first 2 weeks of school.
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