Continuing Education...$10, the Experience, Priceless

I am currently in the active stage passively looking for work.  By that I mean, I have a resume, but no business card; a LinkedIn account, but am not active in group dialogue; recent experience, but my references are from work a decade ago.  So, with two kids in elementary school, who have grown accustomed to a parent at home, and a family budget that would definitely benefit from two parents working, I'm feeling the pressure of finding that perfect source of second income.  The one that finds the experience from my career in the 1990's and 2000's relevant, and the appreciates the efforts I've invested  to become current with whats needed in the 2010's. Tonight, that investment was 2 hours and $10. I attended a seminar entitled "Using Social Media to Build Your Business."   I had the privilege of being in the room with six small business owners.  That alone was worth the ticket price, they've followed their dream, and are seeking knowledge to succeed.  The presentation itself was also worthwhile, covering as much as you can in 90 minutes. But, it was enough to get my creative juices flowing and fuel a strategic approach to finding freelance work, rather then settling for passively looking. Thanks TechColumbus for hooking me up with tonight's seminar at IncreaseCDC

Jack's missing

I remember stressing about my kids connecting with a material possession when they were babies. Not sure why this was so important to me at the time.  One of those new mom things, that you later realize could lead to stress.  The kind of stress that occurs at bedtime, when your now eight year old daughter cannot find her monkey "Jack", and she NEEDS him for her school project TOMORROW and I DON'T UNDERSTAND how important this is and WHAT IF WE NEVER FIND HIM?  (This is what I created, by thinking that my infant child needed to bond with a WEBKINZ).

After two hours of looking, my daughter asked "what was that prayer that we said when my bracelet was lost? Because that worked, we found it."  So we together prayed " Dear St Anthony come around, something's lost that can't be found'  This precious child took comfort in that prayer, and I prayed even harder that  Jack would in fact be found.  It may not seem like a big deal to anyone else, but it was huge, and the ONLY thing that mattered to my daughter.  So, when Jack was found the next day, there was much happiness, and confirmation of faith in prayer... something that is aways good for a child to experience.

The highest compliment

When saying good night to my 8 year old tonight, she mentioned that I was a great mom.  When I asked what I had done that was great, she replied "everything".  I stared right in the face of the insecurities I'd been having about my life and said... TAKE THAT!  I AM GREAT.  Never underestimate the power of a child's simple comments, and cherish them when they are spoken at the most unexpected moments.

Hitting the parenting books again

As an expectant mother in 2001, I diligently read What to Expect when You're Expecting, then, that was the 'bible' for expectant mothers.  Everything was new, exciting, confusing, I was a college educated, career-focused thirty-something, mom-to-be, who thought one book would help prepare me for what was about to happen in my life.  Yeah, well, kind of.... but not entirely.  Two years later, I bought the sequel What To Expect The Toddler Years, only to realize I was too late.  My daughter had already sailed through most of the phases they discussed, oops, hadn't expected that.  Now, 12 years later, I try to attend the occasional parent seminar.  Some I've recently been to have been on topics including bullying, cliques, social media and kids.  With each one, I learn a little, but mostly leave vowing to be more on top of it; and always, I leave thinking 'Did my parents spend this much time trying to learn how to parent? And, how did they manage to get me and my three siblings through adolescence with the core set of values that carried us into our adult lives?' So, I decided to go back to the books.  I have a handful of partially read parenting books, that I vowed to complete this year.  In keeping with that resolution, I added another to the collection (why read five when you can add a sixth?)  But this one, I will finish.  Its called Girl's Night Out.  In reading the preface, I learned that my timing is good, as its intended for mothers of tweens.  Its subtitled,  Having Fun with Your Daughter While Raising a Woman of God.  I've already started it, and read about the first two 'nights out.'  One involves a date for high tea, the other a facial... sounds good.  Hold me accountable, I will blog my progress.  I intend to go through the series of dates, first with my niece, then my oldest daughter.

I'll be honest, I'd thought I'd be taking the lead on this type of thing from my sister, since we'd vowed to raise our kids in the same town, and she had a two year head start on me in motherhood.  But, God's plan was different, as you may have noted in previous blog posts.  Her kids are being raised in a single parent household, with watchful eyes from their mom in heaven. I am not ashamed to admit that a script would be helpful at this point, its been 4 year since her death and I'm still winging it in conversations with her girls.  If the book helps me sort through this stage, it will lead to many wonderful nights out with my girls and my nieces.  Stay tuned...

Family access to medical records

No humor in this post, in fact I had to stop myself from calling it the "I hate HIPAA" post.  I know that regulations exist to protect privacy, and I know that I'm not the first to complain about how HIPAA has made life difficult.  But this is in regards to HIPAA making death difficult too.  My sister died 4 years ago and I'm very close with her tween-aged daughters.  My sister and I had both gone to the same ob/gyn and I recently requested to see her records so I could share details about her puberty, should my nieces want to know.  I'd assumed my sister had listed me as authorized to share medical information, but found out that she hadn't.  Why would she? We talked all the time, there'd be no need for me to contact her doctor... unless she died at the age of 41... which she did.  If you are married and have siblings, or a best friend, add one of them to your medical file as authorized to receive information.  If not, HIPAA requires proof from the executor of the estate.  My brother-in-law is dealing with life as a single parent, he defers the kids to me when it come to the 'girl stuff,'  but since my sister didn't have the foresight to list me on her medical files, I now have to defer to HIPAA to get to the "girl stuff" records.

Full service gas station, redefined

I vaguely remember going to the gas station with my father when I was a child and an attendant would fill the tank, wash our windshield and check under the hood.  By the time I started to drive, self service was the 'new' thing.  Now, you don't necessarily even have to interact with anyone when filling your gas tank.  Yesterday, I happened to go inside a gas station, and later realized that I'd left my cell phone there.  When I returned to pick it up today, it had not only been set aside for me, but the attendant saw that the battery was low and charged it.  My father would be happy to know that some level of full service does still exist at the gas stations that he once frequented 40 years ago, it's just redefined.

12 words of Christmas

We are in the throes of planning for Christmas.  What relatives will visit when, how much we can afford to spend, what picture will we put on the card, will the tree fall down again today?  I was fortunate enough to take a moment, amidst the chaos of planning, to watch a video yesterday called  “The Twelve Words of Christmas” by Louie Giglio.  It was truly inspirational, and grounding.  Inspired by the video, I sat with my husband and kids at dinner and shared the Cliff Notes. One of the things that stood out to me was a reference to Mary possibly praying that her child's birth not occur on that particular night in the stable. She was away from her home, about to sleep in a barn after a long day riding on a donkey, understandably exhausted.  A prayer like that would not have been surprising, but yet the answer she got was quite different.  Thinking that my kids may be able to relate to the pray for one thing, and receive something else message, I attempted to create a moment with them while re-telling the story.  I engaged the kids with questions, like were Mary and Joseph at their house when Jesus was born? "No," they quickly answered, "they were in a stable because there was no room at the inn," .  Then I asked "What do you think Mary may have prayed for that night? Do you think that she may have asked God 'please let me get home, so my child doesn't have to be born in a stable'" Without hesitation, my 10 year old said, "No, I think she was praying 'please let it be a girl, please, let it be a GIRL.'
For all those devoted families, that read scripture or follow a set ritual during the advent season, I commend you.  My attempt at doing that resulted in uncontrollable laughter around the table, although I have to believe that still counts as spreading Christmas Joy.